Archives for March 2010

This morning after our traditional Friday morning breakfast of donuts for the girls and a steaming cappuccino for myself, we piled back into the car to begin the school drop offs.

First stop was Pumpkin’s school. She was eager to go today – dressed like a Pippi Longstocking/Punky Brewster mashup (jeans topped by a jean skirt with a short sleeve shirt layered underneath a pink sweater – I’m not entirely sure how she could move with all her bulky layers). She gleefully joined a game of hide and seek with a friend and The Princess and I ventured back into the sunny day to get back on the road.

In the van and buckled in, we turned on the road again and started driving towards the school. We don’t always talk much in the car. Sometimes we sing to the radio (usually, we do), but not so much talking. I was taking in the road and the way the light cast a golden hue on the day.

Then I glanced back in the rear view.

The Princess’s reflection took my breath away.

She was deep in thought – brow furrowed. Her pale blue eyes were focused – not so much on any particular thing, perhaps, but fixed on something, not glancing about. Her smooth cheeks, her dainty nose (which she does NOT get from me!), her mouth set in a slightly open half smile. She had been trying to figure out something, she said later. Did she want to buy erasers at the book fair and some such.

All I could think as I was looking at her face, though, was just how truly lucky I am.

Sometimes I forget it – sometimes I get frustrated with little things (oh! The bickering! The wadded up bath towels that never get hung on the towel rods), but then I see their faces. When I look at my daughters – when they don’t know that I am seeing them – I am truly seeing them.

And I am lucky.

The Princess is a very smart child. I know, every mom thinks her kid is the smartest, prettiest, bestest, superlativiest kid (And all of you mothers are RIGHT), but factually speaking, The Princess is pretty bright.

And I can’t even say that it’s much that I had much to do with – I mean, I wasn’t a flashcard flipping mom and I didn’t play Mozart to my pregnant belly. She just is THAT SMART.

This morning, Hubby and I sat down for parent-teacher conferences – the typically fifteen minute conference stretched to thirty as we discussed our kiddo and our concerns. The biggest concern has been that school will be too easy for her. This comes from life experience: I FLEW through school – right up until I meandered into college thinking I would take the world by storm and life came to a screeching halt. The grades I had once snagged with ease did not come so easily. In fact, I struggled. A lot. There were tears. A lot of them. And OH THE FRUSTRATION.

I don’t want that to happen to her.

Well, wait. I do.

I want her to be frustrated.

I want her to be frustrated in little bits and pieces along the way. I want her to hit a road block and I want her to figure out how to solve the problem. I want her to have to ask the teacher for help. I want her to have to spend a few extra minutes checking and double checking herself. Not all the time, mind you. Just occasionally.

Prior to conferences we talked – do we need to move her to another school district? Skip a grade? The school system that jumps through hoops to help meet Stepson and his special education requirements doesn’t as readily make concessions for kids that are ahead of the game. There’s no gifted program or other such programs in place to enrich the curriculum for kids who might need a little MORE to keep them challenged, engaged and not bored with the whole process.

We’ve been lucky to have hit the Teacher jackpot this year – from the first moment of the conference, as we settled into tiny plastic chairs when The Princess’s teacher said, “I just love your daughter.” It’s been obvious to me throughout the year that she thinks my kiddo is pretty awesome – I believe she also feels a kinship with her – she relates to her. She told us today, “I was The Princess when I was in school. I teach the way I learned.”

Though the teacher didn’t think skipping a grade would really hurt The Princess (though she said that we’d probably need a boost to get her to that level math-wise), she instead urged us to take another route, and is helping us navigate the system to ensure that we keep finding teachers to challenge our daughter – not just in areas where she is already strong.

It’s funny to me – and I commented as we pulled out of the parking lot, “You’d think that if your child was ‘getting it’, and not having difficulty, your conference would be five minutes long – Okay, she’s doing great. See you later! But that’s not the case at all. There’s a whole other realm of things to consider.”

What I know is this:

After thirty minutes with my daughter’s teacher I know that my daughter is not afraid to ask for help when she needs it. The Princess flourishes when helping other students in the class. She cries when she’s reprimanded (Oh yeah, I knew this one already). She talks about the family a lot (particularly about how much I love to bake). For the most part other kids like her but apparently the teacher is experiencing some cattiness already with the second grade girls and oh my god I can’t believe they’re catty already, I thought I had a little longer til that started. We have options for finding a teacher who is a good fit for her for third grade next year and her teacher is helping with that. She’s a nice kid. She’s a good kid and there are people who are not related to her that think so.

Also?

It’s a pain to get out of those little elementary school chairs.