Not nearly enough writing.

I am finding one of the things I dislike most about having to be somewhat on a “real world” schedule is lack of time to write. I suppose, I guess, that I could have been writing instead of channel surfing reality television this evening. I could have been writing in between commercials during last night’s SuperBowl (some great commercials, by the way – and some lame ones too).

But I didn’t and I haven’t and occasionally I have these ideas floating through my head, things I should write about, things I should share. I have had this post about my daughters tumbling through my head for a week now – I just need to write it. I keep wondering if I can make my words match my heart. How do I describe how truly amazing they are without it sounding cliche – or like a typical mom telling you how great her kids are? I don’t know.

So I marinate in my words.

I have a pain in my neck.

Literally.  A pain – a dull ache – the back of the left side of my neck, shoulder and a little bit of my back (trapezius? lats? I don’t know – it feels like a muscular ache back there). The pain is probably because I sleep on my left side, head propped up on two very puffy pillows. It’s been nagging at me all day – this pain.

And now, my head is tired, my eyes are heavy and this pain – and I think to myself, perhaps I should ditch one of my pillows tonight. Maybe that will help.

I have my clothes already laid out for tomorrow morning – pants, cardigan, camisole, new shoes. Anything to make my morning smoother.

Six months of this routine and it’s still such a different world than getting my kids off to school and starting my day in comfortable clothes, fuzzy slippers. The process of getting up and putting myself together is not a process I love – but a necessary one.

I miss my fuzzy slippers.

I miss writing but the words I give are not the words I want to write – and it seems I’ve fallen out of practice. I guess I’ll have to work on that. I promise I’ll try.