Queen Bees…. Already.

I am going to be a wreck as my girls get older. I just know it, and it bothers me, because I always thought (hoped) I’d be one of those “cool” moms. Why I thought this, I’ll never know, because “cool” has never quite been my thing, but I was still hoping.

I am definitely going to need to read the Queen Bees book – and maybe earlier than I had originally thought!

The other day, The Princess saw her little buddy, J, playing outside in her yard. J is slightly older and is in kindergarten already. Her parents are nice folks – the mom is a teacher, the dad works for a local business – they seem very down to earth. J, however, exhibits what a friend of ours calls “classic only child syndrome” (he was actually referring to his OWN son when he used that term, but it applies to J in my opinion). She was bossy, and snooty to my beloved Princess, and as I watched the two girls interact, I found myself actually getting frustrated that this girl was talking to my child that way.

The Princess, drawing near to her fourth birthday said, “I’m almost four.” J said, “OH YEAH? Well I’m already five… and a quarter!” The Princess said, “After I’m four, then I’ll be five.”

J: “Well, then I’ll be six and a quarter!”
Princess: I’ll be six next.
J: You’ll never be older than me. I’ll ALWAYS be older than you. You CAN’T be older than me. Because you’re YOUNGER.


J’s dad was out mowing the lawn while the girls were playing, and since our backyards are somewhat adjacent, The Princess pointed out, “It looks like your dad is mowing our lawn.” J actually rolled her eyes at my Princess and said, “Well, that’s still MY YARD.” The Princess said, “I know but it looks like he’s mowing my yard.”

J: See that right there? That’s MY shed. And even behind that shed it’s still MY GRASS. He’s not on YOUR GRASS he’s on MY GRASS. My yard is on THIS SIDE of the hill. Your yard is on THAT SIDE of the hill. He’s still in MY GRASS.

At that point, I just picked up Pumpkin and told Princess that the baby had no sunscreen on and maybe we ought to call it a day.

Later, as I was telling Hubby about this exchange, I was still a little miffed by it. Hubby said, “You do realize that you are bothered by what a FIVE YEAR OLD said.” I told him that I was in for big trouble because girls are mean. It’s not going to get any better. Sometimes, The Princess is going to be on the receiving end, and sometimes she is probably going to be the mean one. Girls just stink that way – and I’m a little shocked it starts so early. It was a petty exchange that left me with such a bad feeling – I just know I’m in for a rough ride!

About sarah

Sarah is a book nerd, a music lover, an endorphin junkie, a coffee addict. Oh, and a goof ball. She writes, she tweets, and she sings off key.


  1. I absolutely understand. My Girl is going to be 5 in June and we’ve already seen this start to happen too.

    When she was a baby a friend with older kids told me that her daughter was “5 going on 13” and I think that’s kind of how it goes. It’s just going to get worse until…well maybe it won’t.

  2. Okay, to make you feel good about women, also pick up the book, “The Secret Life of Bees” by Sue Monk Kidd.

    However, I know what you are saying. Girls and grown up women can be mean. It is a good thing there are some good ones in the mix as well.

  3. Anonymous says

    I’d chalk it up to the *only child syndrome* too. It blows my mind when parents don’t reprimand their child for acting like a snot.

    In the future and possibly in her present life, J probably won’t have alot of *friends* due to her bratty behavior. And since she is older and always will be *older* than the Princess, she’ll probably die first, but it wouldn’t have been nice to point that out to J, eh ?! 😉

    I try to teach our kids to say things like “That’s not a very kind thing to say !” or “I don’t like the way you’re talking to me” to help them learn how to set boundaries with others. It’s a good life lesson to instill in our kids, because there’s more kids like J out there (at school, at the park, etc) and unfortunately we can’t be there every minute to help our kids deal with bullies.

    Hugs to you & the Princess.


  4. Hubby thinks that had her parents actually been listening (ahem – there would be the FIRST problem), they wouldn’t have tolerated that tone from her. To be honest, I don’t know if it even bugged Princess – but hyper-defensive mommy that I am, I was bugged FOR her. Maybe I’m makin’ a mountain out of a molehill (stranger things have happened), but, sheesh…

  5. Farm Wife says

    We deal with that from Neice E on a regular basis…and it SUCKS! Baby Girl can say, “We went to the playground today,” and Neice E will say, “Oh yeah? Well, we’re going to Disney World this summer!” The worst part is that 95% of what she says isn’t even true.

    It makes me want to scratch her eyes out…but she’s only 8, and my neice! Help!

  6. This is precisely why I’d rather have a classroom full of boys than girls anyday! We girls can be so snotty to one another. Boys just duke it out and then go on. Makes me want to apologize on behalf of the entire population of my gender….. Still, though it bugs you, kudos on having a working mama-bear gene.

  7. And Heaven help me when it’s my girl doing the bad-attitude-eye-rolling-I’m-superior-and-you’re-pond-scum bit — I think I’ll just want to crawl in a hole and die! She’s going to hurt and be hurt – because Girls are just THAT way – but I really thought I had a few more years before it all started. Where does it come from?

  8. Girls can be very tough on each other! It makes me cringe when I hear Eliza or her friend use “that tone” with each other.

    I saw a little girl a table away in the cafeteria at Eliza’s school whispering in another’s ear with her hand held up in front of her mouth so no one could hear, but both of them were looking at Eliza, and I felt SO-O-O bad for Eliza and what she’ll have to deal with for the next twelve years (somehow I think it gets better after high school).

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