That Whole Nature Vs Nurture Thing

I was one of those people once, dumb enough to think that by nature of Hubby and I having two kids together, they would have this nice common gene pool and Pumpkin would totally be The Princess’s mini-me. How many of y’all are laughing at me?

I honestly thought so.

I thought maybe they would look kinda alike (doesn’t help that of the several other pairs of sibs in our neighborhood, they are nearly identical!). Thought they would act similarly. Thought, sure, they’d have their differences, but, they’d still have so much commonality that the second go-round would be a cake walk because hey, been there done that.

Stop laughing at me!

Instead, I’m reminded constantly (more often than just daily) that they are completely and wholely different people.

That’s alright with me.

The Princess is a little bit of a diva. She loves to look just so. Last night, my sister said something to her and The Princess gave her a look and was all, “WhatEVER!” (Damn you, Hannah Montana!!!). She’s six going on 16, and she is so smart you forget that she’s still just a kid. She’s also pretty head strong, independent as all get out, and puts on a really tough exterior.

On the contrary, Pumpkin is very high energy, very physical. She often sits back to gauge the crowd before jumping in. She wants to be curled in our laps or held high in someone’s arms (“Lift me!” is a common refrain). When you give her a kiss, she pats it into her face and says she’s saving it for later.

I have said for awhile that I thought that Pumpkin’s personality was more like mine. My dad laughed in my face when I said that. He said, “NO WAY. You were just like The Princess.” My mom (ahem) has said the same thing. Diva? Moi? Noooooooo. (I outgrew it, I guess, as I sit here rocking the pony tail, no makeup and workout clothes).

But, it’s amazing to me anyway, how different they are.

What brought me to this long winded post was tucking the kids in at bedtime. Pumpkin asked for a story, a glass of water, and after I read to her and hydrated her, she asked me to cuddle up with her. I laid down for awhile and snuggled next to her. She grabbed my arm and held me close as we talked about our plans for tomorrow (survey says: cupcakes with sprinkles, no frosting). I got up to leave and she said, “Two more minutes please?” I asked what she meant, and she repeated, “Cuddle with me for two more minutes.” And after that, she still wanted me to stay curled up for a bit longer.

The Princess never needed me in that way, so it blows my mind to have a kiddo so snuggly. Granted, The Princess and I bond in different ways like rocking out in the car, going to Starbucks together (oh yes, she’s already hooked – she loves those blended lemonade things that are probably straight up sugar), baking, and reading together.

I guess it’s just one of those never ending processes – learning who my kids are and how to give them the kind of love they want and need from me. Knowing and keeping in the front of my mind that they may be sisters, but they are so unique and individual, and that there is no cookie cutter way for me to be a mom.

About sarah

Sarah is a book nerd, a music lover, an endorphin junkie, a coffee addict. Oh, and a goof ball. She writes, she tweets, and she sings off key.


  1. Robin Wilson says

    Love it, very sweet! And as you know my two are total opposites too… 🙂

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