The Butt of My Own Jokes

Never say never, people, or you may – as I did – end up lookin’ like a liar. I just did what I swore I’d never do, but luckily, I’ve lived to tell about it:

I bought a minivan.

When I first started driving, my first solo-trip as a licensed driver was in a van – not a minivan, but a massive Ford Econoline fan. Even with Nirvana blasting from the tape deck, there was no way anyone (especially me!) could’ve looked cool driving it. Moving on, I first swore I’d never have a four-door vehicle. It wasn’t necessary, two doors were just fine, and, in the event that I had more than one passenger, I would just tip the front seat forward and let the passenger crawl into the back. That was fine for a few years.

I bought my first four door while dating Hubby, when he told me the practicality of a four door car: the doors are shorter, thus less likely to ding into the car parked next to you. At that time, Stepson was a wee one, so there were occasions of having to stuff a carseat in the back.

I swore I’d never have an SUV, and if I did, it was because I wanted it for the style and not because I actually needed that cargo space. After The Princess was born (and after two long road trips with all of her gear), Hubby and I realized we definitely needed more room. We purchased a mid-size SUV and I adored it. I loved that I was able to haul furniture in it (by knocking the seats flat, I was able to haul a queen size bed, minus the mattress, home).

Minivan were never an option. I always figured that if we needed more room, had more kids or whatnot, we’d just get a larger SUV.

With three kids in the back of our sport-utility (two of them in child seats of some sort), the need for space came sooner than we anticipated. On our drive to Great Wolf Lodge last month, we felt crammed, and the kids were so close together that The Princess and Stepson bickered constantly.

Enter one massive sale at the car dealership and a great trade in.

I am now driving a minivan. I picked it up yesterday and it drives wonderfully. I don’t, as I feared I might, feel like I’m piloting the mothership (though it is just that, in a manner of speaking). I love the space, and knowing that we don’t all have to sit on each other’s lap on long drives.

So I am now the punchline to all those mom jokes. Guess I better learn some new jokes!

About sarah

Sarah is a book nerd, a music lover, an endorphin junkie, a coffee addict. Oh, and a goof ball. She writes, she tweets, and she sings off key.


  1. I drive a Chevy Astro. Mid-sized van. I can take out 2 soccer moms in their mid-sized SUV’s without scratching my paint! OK, so I’m prone to exaggeration, but I do love the van. 3 car seats and room for more!

  2. One day, your kids will look at you and your van and shake their heads and say “No, Mom. There’s no way you were EVER cool.” And you’ll smile and nod and remember the days before the van.

    And hopefully, you’ll have even cooler memories of the kids growing up in the spaceship.

Speak Your Mind