Black Friday Is Where You Pretend To Start Christmas Shopping

(And instead go buy stuff for yourself)

I do Black Friday.

I did Black Friday.

And I somehow survived Black Friday despite a sinus infection and a course of antibiotics that has left me queasy and with the taste of pennies in my mouth (don’t ask me if it’s working yet, because so far I am keeping the folks at Kleenex in business and have been on a mad hunt for cherry Lifesavers since my doc said that it would help the penny taste).

After a day spent with family on Thanksgiving (primarily curled up on the couch, trying to not be that one family member that falls asleep – I know my family – that person’s picture always ends up pictured on Facebook – drooling on their pillow), I was not quite geared up to wake up at the gruesome six o’clock hour. To shop.

(I didn’t wake up. I overslept. Got ready in five minutes. Like a boss.)

Hit Starbucks for a venti with an extra shot and was good to go.

Sort of.

Okay. I was along for the ride.

See, the thing is… I never really need anything when I go shopping for Black Friday. There is almost never anything I need quite so badly that I’m going to be upset if I’ve missed the deal. Frankly, I’ve been doing Christmas shopping for over a month, so I was kind of winging it.

Shopping with my mother is an interesting experience anyway – and toss feeling like road kill into the mix, and it was a morning of slow-going. At one point, I wandered into the shoe section of a department store just so I could sit down and stare blankly for five minutes amidst hordes of people trying to get a deal on ugly footwear.

I promise I wasn’t a scrooge all day.

I really wasn’t.

Especially once I wandered into Old Navy and found something I wanted for myself. And then bought four of them. What? That’s half the fun of Black Friday, right? STIMULATING THE ECONOMY, one five dollar camisole at a time. It was Old Navy that I ran into my sister-in-law. She and her mother had been shopping since FOUR IN THE MORNING. I’m just not quite that dedicated.

I did end up picking up some gifts for the kids – easy because there seems to be nothing they don’t want (Pumpkin asked for an iPad – but if mama doesn’t have one, the kids sure won’t).

Today? I’m so exhausted and confused about what day of the week it is and thinking of things that I might have bought yesterday but didn’t (uh, hello slippers to replace the ones the dog ate). I’m on a mission to be done Christmas shopping by mid-month – I didn’t put too much of a dent in to the process yesterday, so, we’ll see.

My Mission. Self Inflicted.

Yes, I was out with the crazies on Black Friday (though, we’ve already established that I found them to be quite pleasant and not really that crazy – except for the people trying to wheel strollers through jam packed aisles in crowded stores: THAT is indeed crazy). Then I went out again yesterday. Then I went out again today.

I would say at this point I am at least 90% done with my Christmas shopping. And now it’s like this itch I have to just finish it all. Now. Rightthisminute. Can’t wait any longer.

Last year, I imposed a December 15 deadline to finish my shopping. You think Black Friday shoppers are nuts? No way – not in comparison to those rabid, last-minute shoppers. THEY are nuts. And, being in Michigan, the further we get into December… well, the weather doesn’t exactly get any better. I’d just as soon be home kicking my feet up versus in my car with a white-knuckle grip on the steering wheel trying not to put the car in a ditch during a trip to the mall to get a last minute gift for so-and-so.

I just scooped up a few things via ten minutes ago after spending the morning with Pumpkin buying stocking stuffers for my mom. I think it’s also worth noting that I have yet to buy anything for myself, though I usually give into temptation once or twice during my shopping excursions. I need to pick up a few small little gifts for my mom’s stocking and that’s done.

I’m done shopping for my daughters (though “Santa” has one more gift to pick up for The Princess). I’m done shopping for my husband. Stepson is darn near done (and if Hubby wants to get him anything else, he’s welcome to – but I’m done). I just need to pick up something small for my brother, my sister and her boyfriend (likely a “couples” gift because I still don’t know the guy really well) and stuff for my mom’s husband (who asked that we not buy him gifts at all – but too bad, I don’t roll that way. I like to give Christmas gifts – so, deal with it).

And that minor shopping could easily be accomplished in a two hour span at the mall with no kids. And that’s a very loose estimate. I’m guessing if I was feeling antsy, I could get it done in one.

That’s the way I like it. I like not feeling pressure and I like the satisfaction of being the one everyone grumbles at who is happily exclaiming, “I’m done shopping!” Yes, you can hate me if you want – but deep down, you wish you were as dedicated as I am, don’t you?

Have you all started your shopping yet? How’s it going?

Thursday Ten: The Detours Edition

1. This afternoon on the way home from my guitar lesson I ended up getting detoured about five miles out of my way around an accident (several police cars and a fire truck were at the scene), which added about fifteen minutes to my drive home somehow.

2. I don’t love detours. Scratch that – some detours are okay. The figurative kind. I can’t think of how many good things in my life were things that I had never planned on, things that sort of happened along the way. And I’m a planner – I love to know what’s going to happen when… (Ask my best friend who fed ex’d my planner to my when I was on my honeymoon. I’ve relaxed a BIT since having kids – because it’s a necessity – but… I still love having a clear idea of what’s in store for me). So, sometimes when something unexpected happens… it’s cool. And life is better for it. But the literal detours? They suck.

3. In guitar lesson today, I started learning “Sweet Home Alabama”. You can ALMOST recognize it, but still… it’s slow. Way slow. I’m gonna get it though.

4. New music this week: “Love Lockdown” Kanye West (And I don’t love Kanye West – AT ALL – but like this song), and “Spaceman” by the Killers. Slow week for me.

5. I took both girls to see “Horton Hears a Who” last weekend. My mom scored free tickets for me to take them to see “Madagascar 2” this Saturday (Free popcorn too – which is awesome because my girls eat a LOT of popcorn). I love going to the movies but go so rarely. It’s odd that I’ll have been three times within seven days.

6. This morning as I was leaving the library, I walked past my van and saw a dead bird hanging out of the grille of my minivan. Gross. I left it alone, got in the car and Twitter’d about it, figuring I’d deal with it later. By the time I got home, fortunately, the sucker had fallen out. Now just a lone feather remains where the little birdy was. There’s something you don’t see everyday.

7. Starbucks is not making a sugarfree version of their gingerbread latte this winter. Means I cannot get a gingerbread habit going again or I will end up needing someone to rip the roof off my house and pull me out with a crane. Starbucks, why did you let me down?

8. Just over two weeks until the “Twilight” movie comes out. My sister wants to go, and my mom is now getting drawn into the books. We may all go see the flick together. We’re such nerds.

9. Still having trouble adjusting to the time change. For example, it’s just after 6 p.m. and so dark outside now that I feel like I should be winding down and my kids should be tucked in their beds. No go. Two hours til bedtime. The Princess has learned to tell the time so I can’t even try to trick her anymore.

10. Thank you Target, Walmart, Toys R Us and Meijer for sending us your big ginormous toy catalogs for Christmas. My girls have gone through ALL FOUR of them and have circled EVERYTHING they want. Their wantyness is annoying the hell out of me on one hand – on the other hand, I could go online and be done Christmas shopping for both of them in five minutes. It’s that easy. I’ve already started buying stocking stuffers for the kids. Has anyone else started Christmas shopping yet?