I Walk So My Daughters Won’t Have To

313 | 365The walk was nearly two weeks ago, and yet I haven’t fully blogged the experience – it’s difficult to come home from being away for so long and figure out just where to pick up and how to get entirely caught up. I spent the first week home feeling like I was trying to staple Jell-O to a tree – and now… I think I’ve got it all back together.

So.

Here’s what you probably already know: This was my third year walking in the Avon Walk. We walked 39.3 miles over two days (however, this feels like a gross underestimation – there are “real miles” and there are “Avon miles”. An Avon mile always seems longer than an actual mile). Typically, the set up is walking a marathon on day 1 (26.2 miles) and a half marathon on day 2 (13.1) – given the set up in California, the mileage was slightly different each day – but the overall effect was the same.

This was my first year walking in San Francisco – I dreaded the hills. I didn’t actually like them much during the walk but eventually discovered that walking UP a hill beats the hell out of walking down. Seems contrary, right? However – when you walk down a hill, your toes hit the front of your shoes — that’s potential for pain, blisters and toenails falling off. No bueno.

Each member on our team raised at least $1,800. This is money that will be used to fund programs for research and treatment programs. The walkers in San Francisco raised over four million dollars - that’s a pretty good chunk of change going to a pretty awesome cause.

And it’s important to say that because I know that during and after the walk, sometimes… I complain. My feet hurt. Walking up hills hurt my butt muscles (What?). I tripped over the crack in the middle of a street when I was crossing it (who’s surprised?). My legs ached. I was tired when I was done.

Whine. Whine. Whine.

You know what?

All my complaints? They’re so small. As a sign said “Blisters Don’t Need Chemo”. I’m grateful for my health and my ability to walk and participate to fundraise for a cause so dear to my heart. Spending two days walking with people I love is a huge win – we’ve done the hard part already: We’ve raised the money to help fund some pretty amazing programs. I’ve said since my first walk, the fundraising is more difficult than the actual walking. In these really rough economic times, I understand that it’s hard for people to part with their money – and there are a lot of amazing causes and people needing help too. It’s hard to decide where to give your resources. I’m truly blessed that so many people supported me, my efforts and this cause I believe in. EVERY DOLLAR MATTERS, EVERY DOLLAR HELPS.

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San Francisco is a breath-taking city and getting to see parts of it I might not see otherwise – well, that was phenomenal. Trust me when I say I would have never chosen to walk across the Golden Gate Bridge – nervous nelly, that’s me – but when I look at some of the pictures I took ON the bridge? Wow. I did it. I didn’t throw up while doing it. I didn’t fly off the bridge like a Yugo, either (shush. I was concerned.).

I’ve walked in Chicago twice – and I have to say San Francisco’s lack of rain and blistering heat made the walk so much more enjoyable.

And next year? Boston. I’ve never been there – and what better way to explore a new city than by walking around it? ALL around it.

Can’t wait.

To get a brief glimpse of what 39.3 looks like in SF, watch the video below.

Thursday Ten: It’s Almost the Puppiversary Edition

1. Puppiversary. I made that up. Yesterday signified a year to the day where we went to meet our little pupsadoodle. And tomorrow (or the next day) the one year anniversary of when we brought him home.
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2. On a related note, “puppiversary” reminded me of the show Friends when Monica and Chandler had a “planeaversary” so I went looking on YouTube for that episode and found that there is someone who posts a lot of music montage videos with clips from Friends and while, sure, I liked the show Friends (enough to remember a “planaversary” reference), I certainly have never liked it enough to devote time to setting Monica and Chandler clips to music.

3. This past weekend, I was able to join Nate & J$, the awesomeness behind Love Drop, on their SIXTH LOVE DROP. We went to visit a family in Michigan and it was an amazing time. I love watching the Love Drop process – watching as people brainstorm, come together and work to make life a little easier for an individual or a family. To be a part of the process is pretty much a “drops in my bucket” kind of experience – getting to see how a little bit of love can go a long long way – it’s good for the heart.
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4. It’s official: The Princess is the queen of making frosting. She made cupcakes yesterday, and the frosting? Light and fluffy like little sugar clouds. I need to take lessons from that kid.

5. Last night I ended up watching an episode of “Toddlers & Tiaras” and I have to say… whoa. Those poor little girls were competing for some title that had the word “centerfold” in it and I have to wonder to myself, as a parent, I don’t really think I want my daughter to be a centerfold… much less…compete to be one.

6. I want pizza. Like, now.

7. Just over a week until I walk 39.3 miles in the Avon Walk for Breast Cancer in San Francisco! I’m so excited! Also? A little freaked out. There are no hills to walk in the Chicago walk. In San Francisco there will be hills. Also… the Golden Gate Bridge. The camera-happy side of me is like, “YOU KNOW WHAT KIND OF PICTURES I’LL GET?!” The bridge-phobic side of me is saying, “Duuuuuude. A bridge. I hope I don’t puke.”

8. I often pull subscription cards and makeup samples out of magazines – I recycle them or use them as bookmarks, as it annoys me to have these loose cards falling out of my magazines willy nilly. I just opened my book to see today that the card I was currently using as a bookmark was not, in fact, a subscription card but rather a sample of a pantiliner. Uh. Fabulous.

9. I took Pumpkin with me to the store today to pick out a hair color (I may not fill my wrinkles with Botox, but the few gray hairs I have really annoy me). I let her pick my color. I hope to not be sorry later.

10. I have just gotten off the phone. I’ve been talking to my dad for nearly 45 minutes. THAT IS A LONG TIME TO BE ON THE PHONE. TOO MUCH TIME. My ear hurts.

Thursday Ten: Sitting on the sofa eating bonbons edition

1. Um. No, not really – but nearly through my first week of work I have established some contract work with my former employer (Yes, I kind of anticipated that would happen – it’s a short term opportunity, but that’s okay), and I am in the process of designing some flyers for the whole “girl who takes pictures” thing – because with upcoming senior pictures and family pictures that hit in the summer – it’s prime time for my favorite kind of photography… PEOPLE!

2. Today is my last guitar lesson for the next few months –  I’m so sad! I’ll miss it – it’s funny how 30 minutes a week can be such a huge part of my week. One of the most joyful and FUN things I do, and I’ll miss it.

3. The end of the school year activities? Gettin’ INSANE. Field day, field trips, permission slips, five dollars here and there, pack a sack lunch, wear appropriate shoes, bring sunscreen, don’t bring glass, award programs, singing programs, make playdough, send in Michigan memorabilia – la la la. I can’t even begin to keep all of this straight and I have it written down in a few places. Today is field day and none of those little pieces of paper say WHAT TIME THE DARN THING STARTS.

4. We knew at the beginning of the year that there were peanut allergies in The Princess’s classroom so that we’d be unable to bake birthday cupcakes this year. Even if I make them completely nut free, there’s no guarantee that they weren’t cross contaminated by peanuts or peanut butter in my kitchen. Fine, I get that. So now I have to do store bought treats (Here kids! Have some lovely high fructose corn syrup! Happy day!). This morning, The Princess tells me, “Let’s buy those cupcakes at the store – those ones are okay – and so and so has a dairy allergy. We need to buy him a pack of Skittles.”

5. Speaking of The Princess – she ROCKED her gymnastics meet last weekend – two blue ribbons, two red. I’m very proud of her. Am amazed every time I see her compete – the confidence she radiates blows me away. Where did that come from? The amount she has progressed in the past year has been truly TRULY exciting to watch.

6. The other day, Pumpkin told me, “Mom, when I grow up, I want to be a paleontologist. And I want to own a wig store and call it Things For Your Head.” Never EVER a dull moment with that one.

7. Just over a month until the Avon Walk for Breast Cancer in San Francisco! 39.3 miles over two days. I did a ten mile practice walk the other day – am I ready for San Francisco’s hills? Uh, that’d be a resounding NO. But I’ll do my best, as always. Not a whole lot of hilly terrain for practice around here! {Just $230 from my fundraising goal if you’d like to donate!}

8. I have thrown away several socks over the past few weeks. ALL of my socks are deciding to get a lil bit holey lately. Makes sense, when you figure I bought them all at the same time and YES I AM BLOGGING ABOUT SOCKS. Shush.

9. I bought new gerbera daisies today. I keep one on my desk, one on the window sill in the kitchen – I keep them in glass frappuccino bottles with the labels removed. It’s the right size for a bud vase. I think the next step of the project will be to find a way to collage these “vases” with some fun ribbon. [Give me a job, I'm contemplating doing arts & crafts]

10. No new music this week, but I still cannot recommend The Civil Wars “Barton Hollow” album enough. I love it so so muchly.

Thursday Ten: Game SEVEN Edition

1. Oh yes, I’d be remiss if I didn’t start out with the ohmygoshtheRedWingsandSharksplayGAMESEVENtonight! It’s been an intense series – I’m hoping Detroit emerges victorious. If they lose, that will suck. (I’m so eloquent about hockey.)

2. Wherefore art thou, spring? Currently, it’s 80 degrees. Humidity is 64% which is code for “Sarah is wearing a ponytail”.  The middle of the road seasons are my favorite – and I hope that things cool down and we get more of a taste of spring again before getting bombarded with all this stupid HEAT.

3. “This is the week you turn to your guitar to cheer you up when you feel like things aren’t going your way.” Or so says my guitar teacher, in a combination of trying to uplift me and probably wishful thinking because I didn’t even open my guitar case with the chaos of last week. Today, she threw Jack Johnson’s “Holes to Heaven” at me because she liked the riff.

4. Despite the ugly heat, I went for a run this afternoon and actually made decent time and didn’t feel like curling up in a ball in the gutter from exhaustion. TWO BIG THUMBS UP.

5. When I said the folks at LoveDrop had a fan for life – I really meant it. Even though the Love Drop for my lovely friend Katie is complete, I have stuck around because I really like what this group is doing. This month, the goal is to help a family in Louisiana. The goal? To get them a car. If you have connections in the automotive industry and can help them reach this goal, or even if you don’t and just want to see how you can help otherwise, please be sure to visit Love Drop and let ‘em know.

6. I am sure that I have talked about them before – but my love for barbecue PopChips has been renewed. I ate an insane amount of them yesterday (NO, I’m not telling y’all how much chips I ate – but it was both a lot and too much all at once). I tweeted about them – that PopChips are like meth, but legal and cheaper. I thought for sure I’d get a tweet back from the lovely PopChips folks telling me to stop comparing their product to illegal controlled substances. Instead, they tweeted me back with the hashtag: #snackcrack. They know what they’re talking about.*

7. A while back, I wrote here about the book We Need to Talk About Kevin: A Novel. Today, I see that they have made a movie from this book – starring Tilda Swinton and it debuted at Cannes to good reviews. While I don’t often care for movie adaptations of books, I’d be curious to see this one. The book was horrifying and gripping and just… I just got goosebumps recalling it. I had to read this book in small doses – but it was tremendous. I hope the movie measures up.

8. As the school year comes closer to its end, the number of activities increases ten-fold: field days, field trips, and performances (Oh my!). Both girls have numerous events in the next several weeks – I’m gonna be one busy mom. Guess it’s a good thing I have a lil more free time right now, huh?

9. Speaking of school, earlier in the school year, I did a rude thing and I set up a filter in my email so that all emails from the PTA would skip my inbox altogether and go directly to a folder that I could review at my leisure. The reason being was that those PTA parents are email-happy – I was getting NUMEROUS emails daily (I’m not even ON THE PTA), and then all the replies to the emails. It was working quite well, until today. Today, my email is getting bombarded with “reply all” messages to the request for food for the staff appreciation luncheon (I’ll offer to bring cookies – y’all know I can’t cook).

10. The warm weather brings me the reminder that I probably do not drink enough water. I get on these hydration sprees regularly – and will consume massive amounts of water…for a few days before giving up. Today is a “guzzle lots of water” day. It’s also a “spend a lot of time thinking about how much you have to pee” day.

*No, I am not being paid or sponsored to talk about PopChips, though, hey, PopChip people… call me. You can pay me in PopChips. Really. I don’t need money, just chips. Lovely, savory, crunchy, salty, yummy barbecue chips. FOR LIFE. Nom nom nom.

Thursday Ten: Wanderlust and Spring Edition

1. As y’all know, I was in and out of Dallas this weekend – what some of you might not know is that I am extremely petrified of flying. The thing is that I had two pretty okay flights this weekend. I didn’t sweat, cry, or hyperventilate. In fact, I don’t BELIEVE I showed any outward signs of fear (That’s my story and I’m sticking to it. Were you on the plane? No. THEN YOU DON’T KNOW. I was probably TOTALLY OKAY.). Now? I totally want to go EVERYWHERE! I have a couple trips on my calendar already – but I want to ride the wave of not feeling throw-uppy about being up in the air. I have always wanted to see the world – see more than my own backyard. I would love to travel more.

2. Guitar lesson this morning went fabulously. Funny what happens when I actually practice. Ah, yeah. I was struggling with a piece of the music (That’s nothing new) and my teacher had me break it down measure by measure – at one point playing one measure probably ten times in a row. By that last time, it was becoming instinct for my fingers to just know where to go next instead of my brain and my fingers not cooperating and missing several notes. It’s funny – this morning, I couldn’t do it, couldn’t play it… now I can. Whee! Success!

3.  Sometimes I read something and it really resonates with me – today that was Austin Kleon’s “How to Steal Like an Artist”definitely worth the read if you want to pop on over there (after you’re done with this extremely interesting list, of course) and read it.

4.  Spring break starts tomorrow – hold me. We’re gonna have to get creative with the schedule around this casa in order for everyone to stay sane and for me to get work done while the kiddarooni’s are off for the week. Everything will work out – but there may be some Netflix streaming of Pinky Dinky Doo involved so I can get my work done. We’ll get it. We’ll be kicking off the break with The Princess’s friend spending the night tonight. I picked up some Freschetta pizzas (Blissdom sponsor love – I hate frozen pizza, but this is good stuff and it means I don’t have to do real cooking tonight – which is REALLY good!) and maybe the girls will watch Tangled… Again.

5. This is one of those weeks where I’ve looked at my iTunes library, gotten twitchy and then pleaded with people for music recommendations. I’m still in my big puffy heart love mode for Ryan Adams (and his cover of “Wonderwall”) – but also on my radar now is Frightened Rabbit. I downloaded two songs from their “The Midnight Organ Fight” album – and really enjoyed them. Worth checking out.

6. I attended parent-teacher conferences at Pumpkin’s school the other day – and was pleased that her teacher noted – as I had – just how much she’s progressed in the past few months. When Pumpkin was in preschool, she had a pretty rotten preschool teacher who told me at one point that she didn’t think my daughter would be ready for kindergarten this year – and I really put a lot of thought into making the decision as to whether she’d go into Kindergarten or Young Fives this year. I followed my gut – and Pumpkin’s teacher said that she has no doubt in her mind that Pumpkin is more than ready for first grade in the fall. Reassurance, for sure.

7. As I type this, I’m eating a precisely measured mixture of Special K Vanilla Almond cereal and regular Special K (really, not at all precise. A bit of one, a bit of another, a quick toss with the spoon – voila). Nobody grocery shopped this week – and yesterday, in lieu of buying REAL food I bought about four boxes of cereal (I also bought five boxes of Kleenex and a can of Suave’s new dry shampoo that smells a little too sickly-sweet-fruity for me to use on a regular basis). If I could live on cereal, I probably would.

8. This morning, I opened my eyes at 7:15, looked at the clock and about jumped out of bed. AFTER SEVEN?!?! I thought for sure Pumpkin would be downstairs sitting on the couch, eyes glazed after having snuck in 90 minutes of television but it turned out… she was still sleeping. I think she’s still sleeping off this double ear infection because for her to sleep past six is nearly unheard of. Nice, though. Is it too much to hope she repeats it tomorrow?

9. For a lot of people, today is kind of a big deal. Something to do with baseball or something? Snort. Yeah. I’m not really a baseball fan, so for me – it’s just Thursday… but happy day to those who are excited about the next several months of baseball. (My favorite part about baseball is… Oh wait. I don’t think I have one. But hey everyone! Have fun with that!)

10. Finally… I try to not overwhelm y’all with mentions of it, but in ONE HUNDRED DAYS (holy cow – only 100?), I’ll be in San Francisco walking in the Avon Walk for Breast Cancer. I’m 56% of the way to my fundraising goal – and every lil bit helps. If you want to support me, please click this link to donate. If a friend or loved one is fighting breast cancer or has lost the battle and you would like me to walk in their honor, you may message me – I’d be honored to wear their name on the shirt I’ll wear during the walk.

More Drips in the Bucket, Love Drop Style

Not that long ago, I told you about my daughter’s kindergarten teacher and how she has been teaching the kids about “drips in the bucket” – how we can add to, or take from, someone’s bucket with our words and our actions. Kind words and actions and love can add to that bucket, harsh and unloving words and actions take away.

After this weekend, my bucket? It’s so full I need a backup bucket to catch the overflow. Yeah, it was that good.

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For the month of March, the kick-azz group at LoveDrop has been working to help out my friend, Katie. I could rehash the details  - but you can just meander back in my archives and read about it, mkay? I’ve watched their plans unfold as we have prepared video for Katie, sent pictures, and there was scheming as to who would be there in Dallas to surprise her and how they would surprise her and what would happen.

The whole while I was thinking, Man. THIS IS SO FREAKING AWESOME. I wish I could be there. It was making me really sad that I wouldn’t – though I knew that no matter what, this was going to be an amazing day for Katie – people from all over brainstormed and really THOUGHT about Katie, thought about her likes and her interests and what they could do to make her happy, make her kids happy. They made mix tapes, sent books and gift cards, sent her to a hockey game. On top of all that, there were monetary donations to help put a dent in Katie’s medical bills.  People with no motivation except to do something nice for the sake of doing somethin’ nice.

I mean, really? It makes the heart swell, doesn’t it?

Monday evening, a little birdie asked if I thought I could make it to Texas if the planets aligned just so. Tuesday morning it was confirmed. Friday? I was on a plane to Dallas to join in the festivities.

Of course, Katie couldn’t KNOW I was in Dallas. You have to imagine how much it killed me to not be able to tweet about anything – like when Erica and I drove twenty minutes looking for IHOP when it was just across the street. (That was SO TWEETABLE, and I had to just let it go. Sigh. All for the greater good, y’all).

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L to R: MaryAnne, Erica, Danielle, Danielle, me - prepping on Saturday to drop some luvvvv.

We shopped for Katie, there was cooking for Katie, baked cookies for Katie. There was even a trip to Hobby Lobby. We prepped Saturday and Sunday morning and when the love drop rolled around Sunday afternoon, it was a truly awesome experience. We got to surprise Katie and her kids. We got to shower her with hugs and love – with both tangible gifts and the intangible gift of community and spending time together eating and laughing and sharing hugs.

Surprising Katie with cookies - picture by @AngEngland

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Alli & MaryAnne

It’s been a pretty amazing month watching how a Love Drop comes together. The guys that run the organization, Nate and J Money, are not only tremendously full of heart, but they are funny, sweet and really great to be around. I love the concept of LoveDrop – how a little bit can go a long way – even a donation of a buck a month can do great things. I’m kind of a Love Drop fan girl now. If you haven’t yet read about LoveDrop, check ‘em out.

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Nate & J$

After spending a weekend with friends – those who have been in my heart for awhile and those who I have just met but instantly adored – I felt truly lifted and blissed out. It was an amazing weekend – to not only get to bestow love upon a friend, but to watch others showing caring and kindness to someone you love? It’s a pretty good thing. Felt good. Drops in my bucket, baby.

This weekend was full of smiles and laughs and conversation. Time with friends, new faces, margaritas. Kindness, generosity, love.
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All good stuff. Very much all good stuff.

TIL Tuesday – Love the Love Drop

There are a great many things that I love – I love cappuccinos from Starbucks and cheap funky $2 knee socks from Target – but one of the things I love most is an organization I learned about recently, and it’s already won a place in my heart. It may just be there forever.

LOVE DROP comes together each month to help one family going through a financially difficult time. It doesn’t take much to help out with a Love Drop – a donation as small as a buck a month still ends up making a huge difference. And when a Love Drop team comes together to help a recipient – WATCH OUT. The love that emanates from the amazing hearts of people… well, it’s a pretty awesome thing to behold

This month, the Love Drop team has chosen to help Katie. Selfishly, I am overjoyed – because Katie is a friend of mine. Katie would never ask for help. Her heart is tremendously huge and she is one of those people who enriches my life and my world – just by knowing her. Katie keeps me positive when I sometimes feel less than positive. And Katie keeps herself positive, even though things aren’t always easy. Here, I’ll let her tell you her story.

 

This month, the awesomeness that is Love Drop is reaching out to help Katie, and helping to put a dent in her medical bills. Next month, they’ll work their loving mojo to help someone else.

I’m in awe of Nate and J Money, the guys behind Love Drop, and amazed at the power of what people can accomplish when they come together to do GOOD. These guys have a fan for life. I love them, I love Katie. If you have yet to check out LOVE DROP, please check it out today.

You’re Saying You Want To Paint Socks

“All I know is, if you don’t figure out this something, you’ll just stay ordinary, and it doesn’t matter if its a work of art or a taco, or a pair of socks! Just create something… new, and there it is, and its you, out in the world, out side of you and you can look at it, or hear it, or read it, or feel it… and you know a little more about… you. A little bit more than anyone else does… Does that make any sense at all?”

-Holly, PS I LOVE YOU

One of the things you should know about me is that I watch cheesy movies when I’m on the treadmill. Now that winter has decided to revist Michigan, I’m back on the treadmill instead of out in the glorious sun. Instead of breathing in fresh air, I’m breathing in basement while watching corny Hillary Swank movies on DVD.

Tonight, I was watching PS I LOVE YOU (she’s married to the Irish guy, he dies of cancer, and arranges for her to get letters from him at various times after he’s died. Say it with me, one two three: Awwwwwww!). It gets to the scene where she’s in Ireland, his mother hands her a letter from him and he’s recounting in this letter the first time they met. First of all, true to rom-coms, they totally meet cute as Holly somehow manages to get lost in some scenic national park in the Ireland countryside (happens to the best of us, Holly). And as they walked together, she goes on this ramble about her future and her life and gives the above quote about tacos and creating stuff.

And then I almost fell off the treadmill.

(No. Not really. Not this time, anyway.)

This afternoon, I spent thirty minutes in my guitar lesson – and that thirty minutes was easily one of the brightest spots of my day. This morning, I went out in the backyard with the dog and took pictures of the snow and the sunshine and the sparkle of winter (I hate it, but sometimes it’s pretty).

And every time I visit one of my hobbies, one of my passions, one of the creative endeavors that keeps me from going completely insane (in my decidedly UNCREATIVE job), I feel like that – that there’s a little piece of me out there – by reading my words, looking at my pictures, holding a guitar in my hands – I get to know a little more about myself, I get to find the things about myself that maybe set me apart, for a bit of time in an ordinary day, I can do something that makes me feel extraordinary.

Thursday Ten: There’s a Thaw Outside

1. Yesterday, I went outside for a walk for the first time in months. Temps reached the mid 40s and I figured, “Why not?” Since many people never shoveled their sidewalks in the past few months (um. like us), I ended up walking in the streets – and the streets were filled with puddles, but even so, it was nice to be outside. This morning, I went for a nice little run. Here’s hoping spring really IS just around the corner.

2. For new music lately, I picked up the new album from The Civil Wars (lovely harmonies and calming melodies — I love it). Also, I preordered the new album from Adele, on the basis of hearing “Someone Like You.”

3. I did a bake sale this week to raise money towards my fundraising goal for the Avon Walk for Breast Cancer. I spent all day Monday baking – cheesecake, cookies, and brownies (OH MY!). I was pleased to raise a few hundred bucks – it makes me happy that I can do something I love to support a cause I believe in. If you feel so inspired and would like to donate, you can click HERE. If you donate and would like me to send you cookies (AND I JUST MIGHT), let me know.

4. I, uh, watched American Idol last night. I like the beginning part when they’re all in Hollywood and they’re doing those group things and they fight and they all hate each other and it’s drama. Also, the group that decided that the show needed to be called “American Lapdance” and awkwardly serenaded Steven Tyler? That wasn’t at all weird to watch. *ahem*

5. This month, our book club is reading The Devil in the White City: Murder, Magic, and Madness at the Fair that Changed America. This book came highly recommended by a lot of my favorite people – but it’s off to a slow start. I was told by several different people the other day that they experienced that too – that it even took up to 100 pages to get into it – but I should be patient because it gets really GOOD. So, this is me. Being patient. On page 76.

6. I promised the girls I’d take them out to dinner tonight. Well, I told The Princess via a note in her lunch bag that we were going out to dinner tonight and to let me know when she got home where she picked for dinner. I also told her “NO McDONALDS!” We’ll see what she comes up with. I hope it’s something good. Unfortunately, she’s the kid that doesn’t like Chinese food OR Chipotle.

7. Sometimes I get a very random idea in my head, like, “Hmm, I think I’d like a fun pair of casual orange sneakers.” I really do want some. But I didn’t buy them. Yet. I’m not sure if these are “the ones”.

8. The folks from iRobot sent me a Roomba and let me tell you, you may be hearing more about it in the weeks to come. Or years. I’m kind of obsessed. That I can just push a button and walk away from it while it does the work? Bliss. He (it’s a he. Don’t ask me how I know this) is a source of entertainment for myself and the kids – they even  made my sister and husband come upstairs to look at him when they came over last night – and once I pick enough junk off the floor to do a full vacuum test, I’ll let you know more about it.

9. Sometimes I get ridiculous. I missed posting a FLIP SIDE picture on Tuesday. So I’m posting THREE today. Yeah. I’m sorry. You’re welcome?

10. I made the worst lasagna last night. I knew when I was making it that it wouldn’t be good, despite the fact that my kitchen smelled FANTASTIC. Too much ricotta cheese, not enough sauce. The thing was so dry, it was like I filled it with paste. Thank goodness I can bake otherwise the family would starve.

A Love Letter To Myself

On February 1, I challenged y’all to write a love letter to yourself. I hope you do. I finally did my own. If you’ve written one, please link in the comments so I can read it.

Dear Sarah,

Well, girly, you wanted a love letter for Valentines Day – who better for it to come from?

I gave you this assignment because I think you need it – I think too often you are quick to sell yourself short, you are quick to point out your flaws, you are quick to tear yourself down. I know why you do it (we share a brain, after all) – but – there’s good to you also.

When you were a kid, maybe the message didn’t entirely get through to you that it’s okay to like yourself – that it’s okay to be happy with yourself or to be proud of your achievements. I kind of like that you’re learning now – it’s not an easy lesson, it’s not a fast lesson… but you’re coming around. And what’s better is that you are making sure your children are raised with more positive messages – you are teaching them that who they are is amazing and incredible and that they have potential to do so much. You are loving them for who they are now, not who they might be someday.

But this is no surprise – this is how you are with most people in your life. You are admittedly guarded as to who (who? whom? Your love letter may not be grammatically correct. I’m sorry) you will trust with your heart – you’ve been hurt, and you’re cautious – but once you let someone in, they’re in. I love that about you – because you have the capacity to care so much for the people in your life, and you do a good job with letting them know that they are thought of, cared for and special to you.

You are resilient and you are strong. Your strength has carried you a long way in life and it is only recently that you are learning that you don’t HAVE to be that strong, and you don’t have to be stoic, and you can show people that you’re hurt and are hurting, or even lean on someone when you need to lean.

You cry, you love, you laugh, you feel, you hurt, you ache, you flutter, you fall, you dance, you retreat, you reach out, you build up, you smile, you embrace.

You wear your emotions on your face – and it’s not difficult to read you – your smile tells a story when it reaches your eyes and your dimples are pronounced and on display – your joy is evident. When you’re sad or hurt, or pissed – that’s pretty clear too. No one really has to wonder where they stand with you, that’s for sure.

You look at the world as if through a lens – and you are constantly framing the world in front of you, which means that you notice and appreciate details that often others overlook. You quote cheesy movies at random moments and you attach significance to your memories with the lyrics of songs. Those who mean the most to you are tied to you permanently through the memory of music.

You can name all fifty states in alphabetical order and you make amazing cookies and you like to share them. You believe in writing notes and touching base, and you nurture your relationships because your friends lift you – and lighten you. You are a smart woman but you still appreciate a juvenile joke. You love words. You do things with words that are amazing sometimes. You dance – freely and unabashedly and you don’t care who is watching or who sees. You are in constant motion – you rarely slow down – you embrace movement – it makes you feel better, and you like the end result of lovely arms and and a healthy body.

Don’t think too much, Sarah. Just embrace each moment and enjoy who and what you are and know that it’s enough and that you’re pretty awesome just the way you are right now.

xoxo,

Yourself.