Happy Birthday To Me

Today is my birthday. I am 35.

When it’s my daughters’ birthdays, I write them letters here. I fill this space with all of the things that made the past year special, all of the things I look forward to in the year ahead. I talk about their strengths, how much I love them, and the many ways they made me smile over the year.

For myself, I’m having a really hard time today.

It’s funny, because I’ve never been the type to get wigged out about age before. I’m not sure what triggered it this year – the errant gray hairs that stubbornly refuse to grow a little slower so I can at least attempt to keep up with covering them up with dye. Maybe it was the realization that I’m halfway to seventy. Or perhaps it’s because I’m now old enough to get elected as the President of the United States – some law made at some point decided that 35 was officially old enough to either ruin or make the country great.

I’m not sure.

I love birthdays – even my own – and so the fact that I’m mired with some idiotic sadness pisses me off. Today is my day and I’m supposed to be happy, and hell, I should even be wearing a tiara (and I’m sure I have one around here somewhere).

I hope this isn’t a sign of what is to come. I saw my mom celebrate her 60th birthday this year with as much enthusiasm as if it were her 20th, and I know that that is what I come from – a long line of people who love birthdays, love the celebration, and don’t really care so much about getting older, but love to have a day of their own – a day to celebrate the day you landed on this planet (sounds graceful, right? THUNK. From the heavens I fell onto the planet – from space to Illinois. Whoomp).

But I also know that changing the attitude is up to me, so, I could start by stop being such a horse’s ass about the stupid number, and just put a smile on my face and enjoy the day.

Sigh.

Maybe this is just early onset senility.

I hear that happens to old people.

I had a chaotic year, a crazy year, but I had a year where I got to travel, spend time with friends and family, meet some awesome people. I saw new places, old places I hadn’t seen in far too long. I lost a job. I got a new one. My hair grew several inches (some of those hairs were gray). I found out I’d get to be an aunt. I made cheesecakes that could make you cry, they were so delicious. I made people laugh. I made myself laugh.

I have no idea what 35 has in store for me, but I hope to quickly snap out of my funk to have my eyes open to what comes my way.

 

About sarah

Sarah is a book nerd, a music lover, an endorphin junkie, a coffee addict. Oh, and a goof ball. She writes, she tweets, and she sings off key.

Comments

  1. happy birthday, pretty lady. i’m sure you’d make a great president 😉

  2. If you run … I will vote for you. Heck, I’ll run your campaign.

  3. HAPPY BIRTHDAY SARAH!!!!!!

    I think 35 is going to be your best year yet!

    xoxoxo

  4. Happy Birthday Sarah, a day late! Hope you had a FABULOUS day!! XOXO

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