I haven’t decided if I’m a bad neighbor, but I really hate The Princess’s “best buddy” J, who happens to live in a house that is almost directly behind our house. It’s gotten so bad, that last week when I was talking about J to Hubby (out of the earshot of little people, of course), I used a Very Bad Name to describe this little girl who The Princess insists on playing with, almost daily.
Hubby said to me, “Do you realize the word you just used to describe a six-year-old?” Of course, I realized the word I used. Of course, I realized it was harsh. I just don’t know how else to describe this kid, who in every period of play, reduces my Princess to a bawling, sobbing mess.
The other day, The Princess and J were coloring outside on the front porch. It was a gorgeous day, so I dragged the art supplies and paper outside and let them be crafty. I scooped up Pumpkin and took her to play on the lawn (I’m still trying to get her to learn how to walk on her own!), and as soon as we stepped outside, J proceeded to tell The Princess how much J loves Pumpkin. I’m not kidding, this little kid actually said the following words to my daughter: “Pumpkin looooooooooves me! She loves me more than she loves you.”
This, in turn, made Princess get defensive (“Does NOT!”), because she’s not yet learned to let things roll off her back (ahem… it’s not a particular talent of mine either). I honestly cringed at this exchange, and though I tried super hard to just stay out of it and let them deal with it on their own, I became Hovering Mom and interfered. I told both girls that Pumpkin loves The Princess VERY much – that’s her BIG SISTER – and there’s no one cooler than a kid’s sister.
The need for this child to one-up my child drives me batty – and it’s probably kid stuff, and it’s probably typical, and The Princess will probably be fine, even if I don’t go poking my big nose into her business. But I can’t help it. I can’t sit back and watch this kid hurt my child. The fact that The Princess seems to forget about the tears and wants to play with J over and over again just blows my mind.
Today, the girls got in a fight over our remote control! A four year old and a six year old, ready to duke it out over who got to turn the television off. I’d had it. At that point, I had two hours of listening to them bicker, and I said, “Take a break.” I was hoping that J would get the hint and go home – after all, what fun could it be if her host was crying? But she didn’t, and I was too polite to make her leave. They sat there for two more minutes and I kept saying, “Take a break from each other.” Neither one seemed to “get it” and no one was making a move. So I had them relocate their bickering to the backyard so at least I wouldn’t have to listen to it.
I’m not a fan of OPCs (Other People’s Children). I have several friends with wonderful children that I adore – and they are the exception to this rule. Well behaved children are fine by me. Even an occasional tantrum or bad attitude – it doesn’t bother me, because all of that is normal kid stuff, to an extent. But J has such a case of Only Child’s Syndrome (OCS), that I really wonder if she just doesn’t know how to share, compromise or take turns. Already at six, it’s Her Way or the Highway.
Given the fact that we’re not planning on moving any time soon, I really hope that J grows out of this, or that me and The Princess grow thicker skin. Otherwise, these next few years are gonna be paaaaaaainful.
About sarah
Don’t sweat it. The same thing goes on all over the world when little girls get together. And for J, being two years older gives her the trump card in the bickering battle.
But Kids NEED other kids to play with, so Princess is lucky someone lives close by (and J is lucky that Princess lives close by as well.) As long as J’s not teaching her bad words, or disrespecting you, or saying malicious morally reprehensible things…Princess will be fine.